“Desperate Housecats” TV Show Rejected

Pearl and Saber at the office

Like all cats, Pearl and Saber believe the world revolves around them and that there is nothing humans find more fascinating than cat-watching.  Recently, they hit upon the idea of starring in a new reality TV series called “Desperate Housecats.”  They contacted every major TV producer and network executive, pitching this new show.  To their utter shock and disappointment, everyone rejected the idea. 

Top 5 Reasons Why “Desperate Housecats” TV Series Rejected

  • Pearl and Saber are not allowed to go outside.  Nor are other animals allowed inside.  This severely restricts the cast and therefore, the available plot twists. 
  • Cats don’t have cleavage, so the show concept scores very low on the all-important “titillation” scale.
  • The script called for Pearl and Saber to sleep on-camera for half of every show.  Saber insisted on this amount of naptime as a condition of work, arguing that it was a reasonable accommodation.  His demand attracted the support of the American Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals (ASPCA), the Equal Employment Opportunities for Cats (EEOC), the Department of Labor (DOL) and the American Cat Liberties Union (ACLU).  
  • The only sponsor willing to underwrite the show was a cat litter company and no one wanted to go there.
  • Pearl’s “diva” contract stipulations were outrageous.  She insisted on a huge allowance for bling-bling and wardrobe.  She also demanded a 24/7 feline assistant because she thought she was too important to do her own hair.

 If you know another reason why a “Desperate Housecats” TV series would be a bad idea, please share by leaving a comment.

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